Family jokes
What feature does an orphan's phone not have?
A home button.
Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks...
"Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?"
"Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea, but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That's why grandpa has to take the blue pills."
What did the paintings name their daughter?
Palette.
When is it bedtime in the Jacksons' house?
When the big hand 🖐 meets the little 🤚.
How do you know your sister’s on her period? Your dad's cock tastes funny.
What did the Asian parents say when they had a disabled kid?
Sum ting wong.
I tried to tell an orphan a knock-knock joke, but sadly, there was no door to knock on.
What's the difference between an iPhone and an orphan?
One has a home.
Sometimes I feel ugly, then I think of my sister and get over it.
My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology.
I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
My mother didn't want me to love my sister. That made me angry. But then, one day I found this quote: "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer." Since that day, I fuck my sister hard and my MOM harder!
I, for one, wish Donald Trump was President again. It's been a while since we had a presidential assassination.
My grandad said I'm too reliant on technology, so I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
Bully: I bet your dick is so small when you look down you can't see it.
Guy: I don't, I see your mom.
Why do orphans love drinking water? Because they have no milk to drink!
Why can't orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy".
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What can you never tell an orphan?
Go home to your parents.
"I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday, but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry."
Yo mama so stupid, she hides behind a glass door when playing hide and seek.