Family jokes
Why do orphans get confused about ancient Egypt? Because they wouldn’t know what a mummy is.
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
The best part of working at an orphanage is you can give them family-size chips.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
You're so ugly that when you were born, your mother asked, "How does my little treasure look?", and the doctor replied, "I think we should bury it immediately."
I bet my mum thinks this 😂
My son said that bully needs a pounding, then I say, "Yeah, right, that is what I said and did to your mother." My son opens his mouth and freezes. I guess he knew what I was talking about.
What's the difference between puppies and orphans?
Puppies actually get picked.
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. That's why orphanages exist!
Mother, father, and a son. Father purchased a robot that can detect lies. The robot slaps when you lie.
During dinner time: Father: Son, what have you done today? Son: I watched Netflix, Dad. Robot: Stood up and slapped the son! Son: Okay! Okay! I watched porn, Dad. Dad: What? You watched porn? You are only 14! I never knew porn till I was 18 years of age. Robot: Stood up and slapped the Dad! Mother: Started to laugh and said "Sure he is your son!" Robot: Stood up and slapped the mother!
Hehe
Who makes the best anteaters?
Uncle's... (Aunt eaters)
What’s faster than a black guy with the TV?
His little brother with the console.
What’s an orphan’s favorite movie?
Spider-Man: Homecoming.
Yo mama is so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
Mom: There is so much of the dog's dirty ball marks.
Me: *umm ohh no* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA dirty balls!
What’s one thing that an orphan can never get in poker?
A full house.
Why should you never throw grandpa's false teeth at a vehicle? You might denture car.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
What is the difference between iPhones and orphans?
iPhones have a home button.
I was the second worst thing to happen to those orphans.
Bob: Siri, call 666!
*dialing noises*
Bob: Hello?
Bob's dad: Hi!