An orphan, an emo, and an apple are on a tree. The apples get picked unlike the orphan, while the emo kid is already dead from hanging.
Yo mama so stupid, I told her Christmas was right around the corner--and she looked.
What feature does an orphan's phone not have?
A home button.
Yo mama's feet are so fat, she had to wear a sock on each toe.
Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks...
"Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?"
"Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea, but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That's why grandpa has to take the blue pills."
What did the paintings name their daughter?
Palette.
What did the Chinese family name their retarded kid? Something Wong.
My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology.
I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
Do you know the TV show "Naked and Afraid?" Well, that's what my grandpa and I played when I was young.
Sometimes I feel ugly, then I think of my sister and get over it.
What's the difference between an iPhone and an orphan?
One has a home.
Why did the orphan sleep outside? ... Because he gets to wake up to Mother Nature.
Roses are red, violets are violets, my dad died in 9/11 and he was a good pilot.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Bully: I bet your dick is so small when you look down you can't see it.
Guy: I don't, I see your mom.
Why can't orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy".
Why do orphans love drinking water? Because they have no milk to drink!
What can you never tell an orphan?
Go home to your parents.
Why is it so easy to bully an orphan? What are they gonna do, tell their mum?
Yo mama so stupid, she hides behind a glass door when playing hide and seek.
