Family jokes
What do you call something that eats kids?
An upset mother.
Your mum!
I don't know why my boyfriend's dad doesn't like me. Maybe because we had sex?
My grandpa died to ligma :(
LIGMA BALLS!
Ur dad is mad.
My uncle <3
I ask my sister why the Chinese owner brings us free food all the time.
My sister said to me "I love him long time."
Mary had a little lamb.
Key word is had, her dad's favorite meat is a human!
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
Annie.
What did the parents say to the orphans?
"YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
What did the mama nut say to her son?
“If I ever cashew doing that, I walnut be happy.”
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap till their parents come home.
Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.
My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!
Your mom is a joke.
Why can't orphans have an iPhone?
They can't find the home button.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family portrait........
You might say I'm mean but what are they gonna do..... tell their parents?
Wait..........
Why can’t orphans play baseball? Because they can’t find home.
My dad tells me and my sister to stop arguing, so she elbowed me in my damn nose.
My sister: See you at home in about an hour.
Me: Okay.
My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*
Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?
Sister: OMG, she's dead!
Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?
Hvis du tenker på det, så er adopsjon siste valget for et barn, så de som er adoptert var siste valget.