Family jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Orphan.
Orphan who?
Orphan who needs a parent!
I dated an orphan and then later married him for 7 years until he told me he was an orphan.
Why did the orphan go to church?
Because they need a father.
What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents?
"My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that, son."
Why can't orphans play baseball? They can't run home.
"Why are all these orphans here?" said Chris.
"Because their dad went to go get the milk," said MrBeast.
3 Years Later,
"I AM GIVING APPLE IN A SHARE TO EVERY ORPHAN IN THE WORLD, AND I'M ALSO GIVING EACH OF THEM 1000000000000 DOLLARS."
If you don't like orphan jokes, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ON HERE??!!! WE DON'T ACCEPT YOU HERE!
If you saw an orphan, could you say where your parents at? And if they cry, just say, "hey here are your parents" then grab nothing. Perfect example.
I rang my boss and said, "I’m really sick. I won’t be coming into work." My boss said, "Davo, you're sick again! Really! Just how sick are you now?" I replied, "Well, I’m in bed with my sister!"
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What did the orphan say to his father?
Nothing, he doesn't have one.
What do you do when you are angry with an orphan? Hit them.
It's not like they can tell their parents.
What's the difference between an orphan's dad and a boomerang?
The boomerang comes back.
I was told to burn calories, so I threw your mom in the fire.
Why do orphans eat an ice cream cone?? They can't afford a family pack.
Boy: Will you remember me in a minute?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a day?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a year?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Knock knock.
Mom: Who's there?
Boy: Bitch, you forgot me.
Me: You have terrible jokes.
Mum: Shows me a mirror.
One time I was at home alone with my dawgy, and I was eating peanut butter. I thought since it's oily, I could use it as a lotion, so I spread it all over my private part. My dawgy came over and started licking the peanut butter off my private part, and my private part got big and hard. Then, white stuff came out of my wee wee, and my dawgy started looking up at me and whining.
And then my daddy came home and saw what I was doing and shouted, "What are you doing?" And I said I was using peanut butter on my private part. Then he said, "Well, let me have a taste." And then he started doing what my dawgy was doing.
Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?
Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!
Why don't orphans drink milk?
'Cause their parents have not came back with it yet.
Little Johnny is watching his mum rubbing cold cream on her face, and he asks her, "Why are you rubbing that stuff on your face, mother?"
His mother replies, "To make myself beautiful, Johnny."
A few minutes later, she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. Johnny says to her, "What is the matter? Are you giving up?"