Family jokes
Yo mama's hairline is so god damn far back even Joe Biden wouldn't sniff it.
Me, Joe Biden: What do you mean *snifff*
What’s the difference between a fruit and an orphan? One gets chosen :)
I had sex with my boss's daughter.
I didn't get fired. I'm self-employed.
A girl asked her mom, "Why is my name Walmart?"
Her dad replied and said, "Because that’s where you were made."
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
... YO MAMA SOO, Oh wait...
This is my brother after getting a girlfriend
Yo mama so fat, when she bought a fur coat a whole species went extinct.
Why do orphans love foster homes?
Because they actually have a home.
What is it called if your mom does not make it to your birth?...
An abortion.
Bully: Agh, you're ugly!
Me: Said your mom when you were born.
I was walking to the store, and then this boy told me, "I'm an orphan and I have no money." He wanted M\&Ms. I gave him a family-sized bag.
You wanna hear an orphan joke?
Okay, here it goes:
You.
Why can't orphans complete homework?
Because they have no home!
What did one orphan say to another? Where's your home?
When an orphan takes a picture, it’s a family portrait.
Your mum is so slow, it took her nine months to make a joke.
What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?
"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"
Fuck, my dad has cancer, lol.
How do you give a redneck a circumcision? Kick his sister in the jaw.
What do atoms and parents have in common to orphans? You can't see either of them.
As a son, I was starting to do pranks. I told my mom’s boyfriend that she cheated on him and she doesn’t want to be with him anymore, and I told him that my mom said that he had a small penis. He left my mom, and she was mad at me. I thought it was funny.
Then I told my friend’s girlfriend that he cheated on her with another girl, and the girl told me that my friend had a small penis. He found out and wanted to confront me in my house. I wasn’t home. My friend told my mom what happened. Then my mom said the same thing happened to me. I came home one day, I saw my mom giving my friend a blow job. I asked what’s going on. My friend told me, "Your mom is my new girlfriend," and my mom said, "This is the penis of my dreams."