Family jokes
Dad: Where is my son?
Son: Come join me with musical chairs, except we stand on them.
Dad: Ok, so do we put this round our neck?
Son: YES!
Mum: AHHHHHHHHHHHH
Imagine me being 12 feet taller than your dad.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To try to find his parents, but it was FREAKING USELESS!
I held on to my money stronger than an orphan holds on to a teddy bear on Father's Day.
Why do orphans play with Barbies?
So they can have a home :)
Memes
Why can you not let an orphan touch an iPhone 7? Because it would break if they touched the home button.
Hi Freshfry, hi Alex, I did not see your messages yesterday because I was at my brother's soccer game, and then people came to our house till 11:00. Lol, sorry :)
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apes get picked.
I will always remember my grandfather's last words before he died: "Is that a real chainsaw?"
I've heard stories of my mother. She was a teenager and left me in the blender, but luckily the power cut out, like at the orphanage.
GURL
Dad: Alive.
Brother: Orphan (fault=Mother).
Me: Dead on the inside but sadly alive.
Mother: Alive...
Wait a minute... I thought you were dead, Mom... Right, you're dead to me at least.
Mom!
Why do orphans like the game Adopt Me? Because they've never been adopted in their life.
Teacher: I was an orphan when I was younger.
Student: Oof.
Teacher: Is anyone not here?
Student: Yes, your parents.
I’ll always remember my father’s last words: “I’m gonna sleep for a little.”
Mom!
Yo mama looks like the dinosaur from Lilo & Stitch.
Where's your mom at?
What did Lucy say when she saw her sonogram?
"Looks like a rerun."