Family jokes
Queen Elizabeth came back before your dad did.
What school can’t orphans go to?
Home school.
What type of flower does an orphan use?
Self-raising flour.
Me: Hi Jacob!
Jacob: Hi.
Me: Your parents went to jail for littering when you were born!
Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
Memes
Why was the orphan stupid?
Because his parents couldn't guide him.
What's the similarity between my son and a rug from eBay? I asked for a refund.
Why is it okay to bully an orphan?
It’s not like they could tell their parents.
Why do orphans go to church?
It's the only place where they can call someone "father."
Why can't orphans play on a computer?
'Cause they have no motherboard.
We better stop telling orphan jokes because their parents will get mad. Oh... wait... never mind.
Want to know how a joke becomes a dad joke? Just wait for it to leave you and never come back.
What do you call a parent that is pregnant?
Buy one, get one free.
What’s the difference between Kendrick Lamar and an orphan?
He has family ties.
Why didn’t the emo attend her grandma’s funeral?
She thought her grandma was trying to flex.
My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.
What’s faster than a black guy with the TV?
His little brother with the console.
Why does your grandma like gardening so much?
Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.
Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.
Mother: "Sweetie, make a Christmas wish."
Girl: "I wish that Santa will send some clothes to those naked girls in papa's computer."