Family jokes
A woman buys a house, but she doesn't know what to name the house, so she stuck her head outside and heard "Hairy butt," so she named the house Hairy Butt.
The next month she had a baby, but she didn't know what to name him, so she stuck her head outside and heard "Crack," so she named the baby Crack.
After a year or two she lost him, so she called the police and said, "Help! I looked all over my hairy butt, but I couldn't find my little crack."
You can get into a fight with an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
What did the drummer call his twin daughters?
Anna one, Anna two!
Why couldn’t the orphan play Xbox? Because there was no home button.
If orphans aren’t religious, they really have no father. 😂
Your momma's so nasty, she sucked your daddy's dick and kissed you good night!
Yo mamma so stupid, she starved to death in a grocery store.
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call “daddy.”
What do orphans call their parents?
Unicorns because they don’t exist.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple actually gets picked.
A man walks into a bar and orders three shots. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "Well... My oldest son just came out..." The man finishes the shots and leaves the bar. The next day, the man comes back and orders four shots. "What now?" the bartender asks. "My middle son just came out." The man finishes his drinks and leaves. He comes back the next day and orders five shots. "Again?" the bartender asks. "Yeah. My youngest son." He drinks his shots and leaves. The next day, he comes in again. This time, he orders ten shots. "My God! Is there anyone in your family that likes girls??" the bartender asks. "Yeah... My wife."
How do you know when your sister is on her period? When your dad's cock tastes of blood.
What does the orphan have in common with Batman? They both lost their parents.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Cause they have to hit a home run.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One of them gets picked.
Mom: It's time for sleep.
Baby: Is that what you think, huh?
Mom: *gives baby pacifier*
Baby: Nice try, hobo.
Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.
*few hours later*
Baby: *still awake*
Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!
Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.
If an orphan tells you there's 365 days in a year, tell them for you it's only 363 days because you skip Father's Day and Mother's Day.
Why can't orphans have friends?
They will stay together.
Yo mama so hairy that bigfoot dated her.