Family jokes

Incest. A game the whole family can play.

When your mom says, "Go to bed," but you reply with, "But Mom, I need help because it is inside, but we are outside."

I met another kid with Down syndrome the other day and attempted to talk to him. But my mom showed up and was asking me why I am talking to the mirror.

My friend's mom died, and he also died in a crash.

Why do I call my priest daddy?

Because he raped my mom when she was 13. She's 27 now.

My sister's name is Coco, and one day she was funny, so I told her, "You coconut."

What do you call an orphan taking a picture?

A self-portrait.

Yo Nan.

I asked my mom to make me a brat. She was sleepy but I said do it anyway. My mom and my dad had fucked last night so he was on the couch but naked. She took a knife and sliced his dick, then put it on a bun, then ketchup and mustard. I said this tasted funny. She was snoring, then I threw it and said, "EW IS THIS A DICK WHAT THE FUCK AHHH!!!!?!?!!!!"

Ever since that day, they haven't fucked again because he ain't got nun to fuck with.

What do you call a crazy-in-every-way sister?

A sissy.

I got stuck in the dryer again. Brother, say less.

I saw a little boy begging for money.

I said, "Are you an orphan?"

He said, "Yes, what gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents!"

The other day my brother hit me. I yelled for mom. No one responded.

The other day my mom called me a retard.

I'm now an orphan.

Knock knock.

Orphan: Who's there?

Not your parents.

Son: Mom, can I borrow $50?

Mom: What? NO WAY! Do you think money grows on trees?

Son: Mom, what is money made of?

Mom: Paper.

Son: Where does paper come from?

Mom: . . .

I saw a kid crying, so I asked them where their parents were.

God, I love working at an orphanage!

You should always be happy about family and love.

My sister's boyfriend is pissed cuz I fucked his girl.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they don't know where home is.