Family jokes

I had morning wood one day. Then my sister saw it and said, "I can help!"

I went to my girlfriend's house one day in Alabama when I met her brother. He said, "Well, I guess there's no more you stuck in the dryer."

"Ur mum is big."

You so gay you have a fat sis and?

It’s funny my sister wanted to have sex with me.

Why do orphans want to be criminals? Because they want to feel what it’s like to be wanted.

Why is an orphan like a boomerang? Because they always come back.

I was crying at school, telling my friends my grandpa died. And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"

What does a man with 20 children do now?

Now he eats sausages even with cellophane.

My mom said, "Don't jump off, we need you."

I said, "No," then I jumped off a building and died.

People have houses, but I don't have a house because I don't have parents, said the orphan.

Why do orphans have water in cereal?

Because mom was never around to produce milk.

If an orphan took a photo, what would it be considered?

Not a family photo.

They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. That's why orphanages exist!

I hate when my brother dates other people.

Just kidding! 😵😵😵😵

Why do orphans live on the street?

They don't have parents to put a roof over their head.

Harry Potter has an invisibility cloak, I have family.

I went to the orphanage and yelled "your mama" jokes.

From your mom.

Why can't the orphan play baseball?

Because he does not know where home is.

What kind of flower do orphans use? Self-raising.