Family jokes
Little Johnny brings his cat to school, and then the teacher asked him why. Little Johnny says, "Because I heard my dad tell my mom I'm going to eat that pussy up when the kids leave!"
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang.
"Ur Grandma" You think you're funny? Well, sorry, but you're not.
His name is "Daddy!" HELP!
What’s an orphan's favorite Marvel film?
Spider-Man: Far From Home.
What did the parents say to the orphans?
"YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
Why can’t orphans go to the hospital? Because they don’t get homesick.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Because they don't have a parent's signature.
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
Where's your mom?
In the bin.
Did you know the F in orphan stands for family... Oh wait, haha.
We should stop making jokes about orphans before they tell their parents... Oh, continue.
Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."
*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"
Q: Why can’t orphans play baseball?
A: Because they can’t find home.
There are only 363 days in a year for orphans because Mother's Day and Father's Day don't count.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Only the apple got picked up.
Why do orphans get iPhones 11?
Because it has no home page.
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
So they could be wanted.
What is the difference between an orphan and a snake?
A snake has a home to go to underground.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple can trace back its family tree.