Family jokes
Dad: Hey, uh... you're adopted.
Dog: *frown*
I once saw a kid walking down the street crying. So I asked them, "Hey kid, where are your parents?" And he started to cry even more...
"Huh. I wonder why he was so sad..." I said as I walked into the orphanage.
Your mom checked for your hairline, but she could not find it.
What do the Twin Towers and my Mom have in common? They both went down on my dad.
Your mama's so young your dad went to jail.
Why can't an orphan hit a home run?
He's got no home to run to.
Why can't orphans be gay? They don't have a closet to come from.
Son: “Dad, did you get the results of the DNA test back?”
Dad: “Call me George.”
My ex's dad died while she was texting me. She said she had a boyfriend, but I told her I had a dad.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't have a closet to come out of.
Adam and Eve had 3 male children, the only children on Earth. How did they reproduce?
I just competed in a wrestling tournament. The first guy hit me harder than my dad’s belt.
Why did the orphan girl cry during sex?
Because her boyfriend said "Who's your daddy?"
BAJAHAHAHHAA
What do you call 3 orphan girls in a tornado?
All of her twist.
Your dad's Spider-Man because he's far from home.
An orphan walks into a shop but gets lost, so he calls his mum but then remembers.
My mom said if I'm awake playing Roblox still, she said she was going to bang my head against the keyboard. hxhdhduhxbsfj.
Why do cops never put orphans in jail?
Because they aren't wanted.
Mom, where are we going?
To your grandma's funeral.
Yeah, 'cause I 360 no-scoped that b*tch in the face.
What is the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?
One of them is picked.