Family jokes
“In yo mama.”
Jake: Can I go outside?
Mom: Did you clean your room?
Jake: No.
Mom: Then f*ck no.
Jake: Alright, bet.
(Brother named No)
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your grandma died, your dad left you too, Now you're living with your old grandma coot. Oh, let's not forget your mom left you, too. You gon' live alone, die alone, with no roses on your casket, too.
What do you call a straight orphan?
A no homeo.
I farted in my grandma's breathing machine.
My grandma unplugged the internet cable, so I unplugged her life support.
My grandma told me I was next at my brother's wedding, so I told her she was next at her husband's funeral.
What do you say to the orphan?
"Shut up, get a mom and dad!"
When your mum sold you on eBay for £2 pound for girls stripper.
Orphan: Hey, where's the milk?
Dad: . . .
Hey guys, can we stop making these jokes? If my mom sees this, I will never see the sun again.
Oh . . .
:(
Continue.
Steve Kerr really named his son Nick.
What do apple trees and orphans have in common?
The apples get picked.
Yo mama so scary that the monsters have to look under the bed for her.
Yo mama so ugly that the monsters thought that she was their mother.
What do orphans and broken up couples have in common?
They can't see each other anymore.
Your sister is so short, she needs to roll up her panties.
Your mama so fat that when she sits around the house, she literally sits around the house.
What's an orphan's favorite sport?
Baseball, because they finally have a home.
How did your dad come back with the milk? The Milky Way.
Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball?
Because no one misses them.