Bitch: Nice eyes brows
Me: Yeah wears yours motherfucker
Bitch: (Realizing she shaved them off cause she thoughts it would look cool)
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Uriah. Uriah who? Keep Uriah on the ball, Laquon Treadwell!
What body part takes the longest to decay? The eyeball, because it will always dilate.
10 Fun Facts.
1. You can't wash your eyes with soap. 2. You can't count your hair. 3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out. 4. You just tried number 3. 5. When you did number 3, you realized it's possible, only you look like a dog. 6. You're smiling right now because you were fooled. 7. You skipped number 5. 8. You just checked to see if there is a number 5. 9. Share this with your friends to have some fun too :-)
What did the right eye say to the left eye?
"Between you and me, something smells!"
I went to the eye doctor and I couldn't read. They showed me a picture of a birthday cake and I thought it was a menorah!
What do you get when you are hungry? A dog to eat
Why are your eyes blue? CUZ THEY HAVE FOOD COLOURING IN THEM
At school, Bobby's classmate tells him some depressing stuff. Later that day, Bobby comes home crying and his mom greets him at the door with "Why are you crying?" Bobby says, "Someone said my grandpa died, but when did he die?" His mom looks him straight in the eye and says, "Depends, which one are you referring to?"
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing and his eyes are glazed.
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
“I think my friend is dead!” he yells. “What can I do?”
The operator says, “Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There’s a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, “OK, now what?”