Experience Jokes

Have you ever heard of sex? Because you just got fucked.

I'm jealous of the people who never met you.

Life's a bitch, and then you die. I now see what they mean.

Nostalgia hits you like a train.

It's so hard, you can even wake up.

I laughed at my life so hard.

When you start middle school

Two images of Kermit the Frog. On the left, a normal looking Kermit with the text 'ME GOING INTO MIDDLE SCHOOL.' On the right, Kermit is hooded and looks dark with the text 'ME LEAVING.'

What's the cruelest joke?

Life.

Everyone makes mistakes. Just ask your parents.

"Nepal is a good place because it has been a great time for me."

What's the difference between Rorochan and skydivers?

One does it for the cash, the other for the views.

First bite: Oh my God!

Second bite: Oh my, God!

Déjà Vat: the feeling that you’ve heard that bad joke before.

Life.

This is a bad day for me.

What's the difference between babies and onions? I cry when I cut onions.

I got sad today.

I was literally cradlesnatched as a child.

Yeah, in the arms of an older woman experiencing my first rounds of motorboating.

What kind of experience does a feminazi have for being a feminist?

Being a bitch.

Hi there! My name is Michael Grover, and I am an explorer. Ever since I’ve been little, I’ve loved searching for new things. As a baby, my parents kept finding me in nooks and crannies around the house. “On the search,” as they would say.

By the age of 5, I had been to every continent on the planet, barring Antarctica. For my 12th birthday, my parents got me diving lessons, and by the time I was 13, I could scuba dive to a depth of 40 meters, as well as go cave diving.

I got a pilot’s license by the age of 17, and I learned to sail just before my 18th birthday. Instead of going to university, I decided to travel around South America, exploring its rich jungles and beautiful landscapes.

During my trip, I met my now wife who was also an explorer. For our honeymoon, we sailed around the Caribbean, and we discovered 3 new islands which we named after the cats that I had growing up.

Over the course of my life, I have come across great treasures and wondrous experiences. But in all my life, and in all my travels, I’m afraid I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said.

I pooped in a bottle and stuck my finger through it.

I took some of the boo boo out, licked it, and rubbed it on a wall, making a BOO BOO portal. I jumped into it and I saw BOO BOO LAND. I rolled all in the chunk poop and drank the diarrhea.