Existence jokes
Why can't you fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
Little Johnny died.
Why do gay men and lesbians believe that bisexual men don't exist because there is no such thing as male bisexuality?
Because it doesn't cycle π².
Why am I happy? I'm dead.
I love how all these jokes about different accidents have happened, but why isn't anyone writing about how much of an accident we all were?
Memes
Want to hear a joke? My life.
Your mama is so fat, the Marvel Universe disappeared.
Your hairline is as nonexistent as your dad.
Don't hate life, love it because when you want to live and try again in life, it's already too late. :(
What's the most annoying thing in the world?
When you're told you're still qualified to live.
Person 1: How smart are you?
Person 2: Really smart.
Person 1: Ok. If you have 3 ghosts and take away 2, how many are left?
Person 2: 1 ghost is left.
Person 1: Wrong! 0 ghosts are left because ghosts don't exist!
Sad life goes, joke mom.
My life, part 2.
Who wants to hear the biggest joke ever?
My life.
Why did the Orphan have imaginary parents?
Because his last parents existed.
Why are we here?
What do you call someone without a body?
Nobody.
The only reason Stephen Hawking died was because he saw the end.
What's the difference between Madlen Makan and Stephen Hawking?
Nothing, they're both dead.
My chance of finding love.