Egg jokes
When my dad left, he said he would bring back the milk, but 20 years later he only came with my new sister and eggs. And I confronted him, and he said, "I used all the milk to make your sister."
A pancake and an egg walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.”
Why did the chief go to jail?
Because he beat the eggs and whipped the cream!
What's white, yellow and goes 40 mph?
A train driver's egg sandwich.
Why did the people get a chicken?
To make eggs.
They never told us Humpty was an egg. A man died then!
Teacher's pen is RED, our pen is BLUE, she is marking an EGG on my marksheet, left with questions and no CLUE.
What does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common?
Both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.
What did the blender say to the orange juice?
"What the fuck are you, you are so fucking stupid, shut the fuck up."
A nut told me to eat him, so I did, but something weird happened. I turned into a nut, and when I poop, there were eggs there.
What egg do you buy an orphan?
Free range.
Don't crack this joke up!
Why can’t baby ducks lay eggs? Because their quacks are too small.
What do you call a bald Mexican?
A huevo.
Crack me, break me, love me, and you ate me--egg.
Yo mama so fat, when she landed on the earth, the earth cracked like eggs. LOL.
What has to be broken before you can use it?
Answer: An egg.
What do you call Peg and Cat from Peg + Cat? Egg + splat.
Eggy joke for all to enjoy!
I love eggs!
I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: "This'll be interesting."