I wasn't going to visit my family this December, but my mom promised to make me Eggs Benedict. So I'm going home for the hollandaise.
You know why eggs can't tell jokes?
They crack each other up!
Enyaw’s fanny smells of dirty, moist, fishy, rotten egg, dead Elizabeth, pig dick, cow cum filth.
Dirty bitch!
What do eggs use in war? Eggk47s get my yolk this is really cracking me up!
They’d probably get shellshocked, wasn’t it all eggcellent? Ok, Ok, I’m headed for the egg-it.
Why did the new egg fell so good? It just got laid.
You wanna hear an Indian egg joke? (yeah-)
Never mind. You won't understand.
What do you call a hippo that lays eggs? A eggoppotimos.
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
What did the evil chicken lay? Deviled eggs! Get it guys Devil-ed eggs! 😆
Why was the chicken screaming?
He had an egg stuck in his butt.
My stepsister is a big titty goth. Should I tap that?
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
What do eggs 🍳 like doing on stage?
Cracking yolks
How to make emo cakes:
Milk Butter Eggs Sugar We're Going Down Swinging!
One day it was me and my sister in the house. My sister said to me, "Let's order food." I said, "We have no money." My sister said, "It's cool; we're just going to order egg rolls from the Chinese store. I know the delivery boy, and he won't charge us." I said, "Cool."
The delivery boy came with the egg rolls. I took some and ate mine in my room. I went back in the kitchen. I see my sister giving the delivery boy a blow job. I ask, "What are you doing?" My sister replied back to me, "You had your egg rolls; let me enjoy mine." Then the delivery boy said, "Don't no charge."
Chiefs is an egg-cellent cook!
What is an egg joke?
Egg-xcellent question!
When my dad left, he said he would bring back the milk, but 20 years later he only came with my new sister and eggs. And I confronted him, and he said, "I used all the milk to make your sister."
A pancake and an egg walk into a bar. The bartender says “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast”
Why did the chief go to jail?
Because he beat the eggs and whipped the cream!
What's white, yellow and goes 40 mph?
A train driver's egg sandwich.
