When your mom fell down, a 10 magnitude earthquake shook the Earth.
Two Canadians die and end up in Hell. Satan decides to pay them a visit, so he walks into their room and sees them talking and laughing. Confused, he asks them why they're happy.
They tell him, "Well, we're so sick of the cold where we're from, and this place is nice and toasty."
Satan, annoyed, storms away and goes to Hell's boiler room, where he turns up the temperature.
He goes back to the Canadians' room, along the way being begged by all sorts of people to put the heating back down. He enters the room to see the Canadians having a barbecue. Furiously, he asks them what they're doing.
"Well, we can't pass up this wonderful weather without getting out the barbecue!"
Satan realizes he's been doing the wrong thing. He goes to the boiler room and turns it down until it's at a colder temperature than ever seen on earth.
He knows he's won now, so he goes back to the Canadians' room, only to see them jumping up and down in excitement.
He shouts at them in fury, "WHY ARE YOU STILL HAPPY?!?!?!"
They look at him and shout at the same time, "Hell froze over! That means the Leafs won!"
Earth is full. Go home!
At first I was skeptical, but the universe has really grown on me.
the earth was flat until yo mama buried herself
Did you hear the one about the hills?
It was hillarious.
Three nuns died in a car crash. They went up to heaven at the pearly gates. The gatekeeper said, "This really should not have happened, so I am going to send you back to earth as different people. Tell me who you want to be or look like." The first nun said, "I want to look like Madonna." Puff, you look like her now, but you canβt use her name. And sent her down to earth. The second one said, "I want to look like Marilyn Monroe." He then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun said, "I want to look like Sarah Pipalini." The gatekeeper says to her, "Sarah Pipalini, who is that?" She gives the gatekeeper a newspaper article. He reads it, shakes his head no, and says, "Itβs not Sarah Pipalini, it's Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men."
What does the Bible stand for? Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth
I wondered as the rock in the sky got bigger and bigger than it hit the bottom o f the earth and "explosion"
π¨π§π»βπ¦° day was that good fun day at home π I had to the earth and I love it when you get a home and walk walk home from school and walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home π was your birthday π I did
yo mama so big her belt size said equator
Why do mountains never rest?
Because itβs ever-est.
Stephen Hawking is better than NASA. They study black holes that are 8 billion years old, while he was down here on Earth staring at 14-year-old black holes. πππ
Your mum is so fat, flat earthers think she's round!
Dude, if there is a watermelon, shouldn't there be an earthmelon, airmelon, and a firemelon? The elemelons.
Yo hairline so far back, it oversaw the creation of the earth!
Yo mamma so fat, scientists say she's the closest planet to Earth!
Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun?
Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.
The earth used to be flat.
Till they buried yo mama.
I made Google Earth for orphan kids.
Sadly, it does not show where home is.
