Earth jokes
You know, the earth was flat till they buried your mama.
"Eeee, is a time for a tree night out to a tree. 🌲 I can fly to the earth day to day day one night type and a walk in and a tree."
The earth is not round.
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The Demon when it gets summoned to earth only to find out it was a spelling mistake in Latin class. 😬
What keeps you breathing when you're on Earth?
I don't know. I suffocated at birth.
At first I was skeptical, but the universe has really grown on me.
Earth is smaller than Uranus, wth?
Why was the mountain in love with the volcano?
Because the volcano was hot!
Ya know, Kobe made a real impact on the earth!
Yo mama's so fat, when she sat down there was a big earthquake.
You're so skinny you're a thin stick.
You're so fat that when you got in Pacific Ocean, you became the Pacific Ocean.
You're so ugly you got stuff for free.
You're so nasty that when you eat spaghetti, you thought it was throw up.
You're so fat you're the fattest person on Earth.
You are so gay you kissed the boy last night.
What do you call a un-funny rock?
A normal rock.
What is the biggest butt in the world?
The bottom of the ocean.
What is the difference between a human and a magic house?
To the Earth, is the human body of the human being human? Is it human? Human can be the one day today after the night is the snow time and a.
What's the worst living thing on planet earth?
Humans.
Did you hear the one about the hills?
It was hillarious.
A little girl asks her mum, "Mummy how was I born?"
Her mother smiled and replied: "Once upon a time, your daddy and I decided to plant a wonderful little seed. Daddy put it in the earth, and I took care of it every single day."
"The seed slowly grew more and more leaves, and in a few months it turned into a beautiful, healthy plant. So me and Daddy took the plant, dried it, smoked it and got so high that we fucked without a condom!"
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land doesn't wave back! 🤣
Stephen Hawking is better than NASA. They study black holes that are 8 billion years old, while he was down here on Earth staring at 14-year-old black holes. 😈😈😈
Why don’t mountains take things seriously?
Because they’re hill areas.