Dying jokes
Why did Paul Walker die? Because he crashed a car into a tree.
One day, a chicken went to the nail store. He asked the "owner" where the shampoo was. "BRO IM NOT THE FRIKKIN MANAGER!" the guy said. So the duck walked away.
The next day he went back to the store and asked a pregnant lady why she was so fat. The lady punched him and ran away. The duck cried. Then he went to the lady's husband and said that he must be tired of being married since she punches people every day. The man punched him. The duck assumed they were the punching couple. The duck walked, and then fell in a ditch and stayed there to die. The pregnant lady and her husband were very pleased >:) muhahahahahahaha
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, how did you know and what gave me away?
Me: Where's your parents?
Orphan: They died and I have a phone, why?
Me: Because it has a home button.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost WiFi connection.
Your mom so ugly that Paul Walker died.
A man walked into a fleshlight and died.
My dog died.
Hahahahahahah I'm dying.
The person I hate: Omg, my mom and dad just died.
Me: Omg, I am so sorry, don't worry.
The person I hate: I have a boyfriend.
Me: Well, I have a mom and dad.
The person I hate: Rood.
Me: Shut up.
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?"
The horse replies, "My wife just died of cancer, and my alcohol addiction is tearing my family apart."
The bartender responds, saying "Oh" sympathetically. "Sucks to be you!" the bartender yells, throwing a bottle of wine at the horse.
What is a box called when a cough dies in it?
A coffin.
I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... He died of hearing aids.
Why did the dick suck my ass? They died.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his son wanted to charge their phone, so they unplugged him.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He tried to get the free cracked version of Windows 10.
Stephen Hawking died because he turned off his VPN.
How did Steven Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
His Windows update wasn't available.
The point of war is not to die for your country, but to make the fresh recruit on the enemy's side die for his.
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies? Windows plays the shutdown music.