Dying jokes
Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.
It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.
I saw an orphan on the street. I said, "Where are your parents?" He cried and said, "My mum and dad died in a car crash!" 😆😆😂😂🤣
I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... She died of hearing aids.
Which way is quicker to die? Noose or slitting my throat?
A priest sees a man about to commit suicide. The man says, "I have nothing to live for here. I will die, go to Heaven, and get 72 virgins." Then the priest says, "No need for this. I will take you to the local elementary school."
How did 10 die?
Because it was in between 9 and 11.
Is it necrophilia if they die while you're having sex and you just don't realize?
That's what happened to my dog.
Did the people of England see a "game over" sign in the sky when the queen died?
Why did Queen Elizabeth II die? She forgot to heal after all those storms.
My grandpa died in 9/11. He crashed a plane.
My grandpa died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.
It's not nice to make 9/11 jokes. My uncle died in 9/11...
He was one of al qaeda's best pilots.
My uncle died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.
My teacher asked me what my favorite number was yesterday, and I said 2977. I chose 91 for my football jersey number and Sharpied a 1 after the other 1, and my teacher Mr. Jackson's dad died in 9/11, and when he was talking about it Friday the 9th, I threw a paper airplane at him and got suspended for 3 days starting Monday.
Hang in there, ya emo bastards! Remember, you could always be dead. Oh, too soon?
No wonder they wanna die so much. I'd wanna die too if I was a freak who listens to Black Veil Brides!
Anybody got a knife? I mean, an emo dildo?
Why did Queen Elizabeth the II die?
Because she ran out of immortali-tea.
My emo friend got jealous when my phone died.
Yes, the Queen has died today. Can the people of the world please finally tell Harry to stop cross-dressing as her?
Me: 911. You: You died 9/11.
My grief counselor died.
He was so good, I don’t even care! 😂😂😂