DoS jokes
Why do you call a man that is physically handicapped and German?
A physically handicapped bisexual man that is promiscuous and German.
Why do orphans become criminals? Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.
What do you call an Indian gymnast? Balance Singh.
They found water on Mars. Mars:1 Africa:0
What do you get when you put a suicide bomber in a wheel chair? An RC-XD.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Orphans don't get picked.
A kid is watching TV and sees an ad about adopting an animal. He then turns to his mother and says, “Do we have to adopt a donkey?” “No,” replied the mom, “but we decided to do it... we adopted you.”
Memes
A blind guy walks into a bar with his seeing eye dog. He then picks his dog up by the tail and starts to swing him around. The bartender asks him, "Hey man, what the hell you doing?"
Blind guy says, "Just looking around."
What do Michael Jackson and caviar have in common? They both come on little white crackers.
What do you call a movie with kids with cancer? ... Finding Chemo.
What do you get when you mix up a group of emos?
Suicide squad.
Why do heterosexual men like to receive an anonymous blowjob at an adult bookstore? Because they don't want gay men and bisexual men in the LGBT community to find out that they also like getting their cocks sucked by men, but they don't want gay and bisexual men in the LGBT community to find out.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
What do you call an orphan who grows up and becomes a priest?
Father Les.
Why is it that when I'm in school doing PE, it's fine for someone to say "boys against girls", but the moment I say "blacks against whites" I'm the bad guy?
How do you rape a feminist? Tell her you are a woman and she will let you do whatever. You won't even need to force it.
A boy walks in on his parents having sex. "What are you doing to my mother?!" the boy screams at his father, and runs out of the room.
Soon, the parents hear screams coming from the father's mother's room. They both go running. They see the little boy pumping into his grandmother like anything. "What are you doing to my mother?!" the father screams. "It's not so easy when it's your mother is it?" says the boy.
Little Johnny was playing outside and steps on a honeybee. His dad sees this and says, "I saw what you did and for that, you get no honey for two weeks." Johnny replies, "I don't care, I don't like honey anyway." About fifteen minutes later, Little Johnny is playing with the butterflies and rips the wings off of one. His dad bursts out and says, "I saw that, and for it you get no butter for a month." Little Johnny replies, "I don't care, I don't like butter anyway." Both Little Johnny and his dad go in for dinner. Johnny's mother sees a cockroach on the ground and steps on it. Little Johnny looks and smiles and says, "Do you want to tell her or should I?"
I don't always roll a joint, but when I do, it's my ankle.
What do you call a Dino stripper?
A dinowhore.
What do you call a cow jumping over barbed wire? Utter destruction.
Whenever you're mad, just punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?