DoS jokes
What do city plumbers and pedophiles have in common?
They both lay pipes in public parks.
What do you call an Indian electrician?
Ashok š
In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common?
They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.
What do you call a bear with extreme mood swings? -- A bi-polar-bear.
Jared from Subway. Remember kids, "tuna sub" backwards is what I'm going to do on your face.
Memes
What's the difference between a pizza delivery guy and a cop?
Pizza guys get punished for not doing their jobs properly.
How do skeletons have sex?
They bone each other.
What do you call a retard in a house fire?
Flame Retardant.
Police: Where do you live? Child: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live? Child: With me.
Police: Where do you all live? Child: Together.
Police: Where is your house? Child: Next to my neighbor's house.
Police: Where is your neighbor's house? Child: If I tell you, would you believe me?
Police: Yes. Now tell me. Child: Next to my house.
Police: ... Child: š
Police: *Proceeds to beat the life out of the child*
Son: Mom, what is dark humor?
Mom: Son, do you see that man trying to tie his shoe with no hands?
Son: Mother, you know I'm blind and can't see!!
Mom: Exactly!
Where do feminists go when they die? "Hell's Kitchen."
What would Batman do if he wasn't rich?
He would be robin.
How do you rape a feminist? Tell her you are a woman and she will let you do whatever. You won't even need to force it.
š³ š³ š³ what can a physically handicapped āæ š¬ šØ šØ gay man can do better than a physically handicapped āæ bisexual man šØ š© šØ š¤ when his š mouth is wide open š when his head is sticking out under the stall inside the men's š¹ restroom š» at a rest š“ area š“ suck the chrome of a tall pipe š
What do you call an autistic kid with a glock?
Special forces.
Btw, I'm 13.
What do you call a hot tub full of special ed students?
Vegetable Soup.
Why do people keep on making jokes about the twin towers?
Because they go down so well.
Why is the orphan failing all his classes? He can't do homework.
Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!
What do you call a psychic midget in trouble with the law?
A small medium at large.