What do you get from a dwarf cow?
Condensed milk.
What do you call a train with bubble gum?
A chew chew train.
Oh man, I'm depressed.
What do you call depressed Sesame Street?
Emo's World.
How do bitches talk about body positivity when they have no body to even be positive about?
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalottapuss.
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
I'll never forget my grandma's last words, "What are you doing in here with that hammer?"
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
One time this kid came back from school and said, "Mom I have one good news and one bad news, which one do you wanna hear first?" And his mom said, "Good news please," and the boy said, "I got 100% on my math test today." and his mom gave him a hug, and the boy said, "Now to the bad news, I LIED!"
I hate when I lose my white friends in the snow and my black friends in the dark. Where do I lose my friends from Afghanistan?
In an explosion.
What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed?
A baked potato.
What do you call the penises of gay men that are in wheelchairs?
Meals on wheels 😋😍🌭🌭🌭🌭🌭
If prostitution had a tax-exempt status, and if an adult bookstore had a tax-exempt status because of a glory hole, churches would have to do something else to keep their tax-exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business.
Why do bees have sticky hair? They always use honeycombs.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special Forces.
What do you call a night guard at the glory hole inside a adult bookstore?
Guardian of the confessional booth.
what do you call it when you get married in Panera Bread?
Panera Wed.
Nobody
Literally nobody
Gordan Ramsey: do you need me to bring Hitler back to life so he can show you how to use a fucking oven?
What do you call a drunk, depressed man that skydives?
Splattered.
