Dont

Dont jokes

What is the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?

I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

My pencil sharpener when I bleed:

And I don't really care how bad it hurts. Cause you broke me first.

Yo mama so fat, when she had an interview for NASA, they said, "We don't hire planets."

Why can't an orphan get a tattoo at a young age?

They don't have parent permission.

Don't worry, the forehead jokes were recommended just like your hairline.

My dad is really angry at me for kicking the balls. He's the one that told me always aim for them. Is that why I don't have a brother?

Man: Hi, Doc, I have a problem. I take a shit at 6:00 AM every morning.

Doc: What's wrong with that?

Man: I don't wake up until 8:00 AM.

Orphans maybe got phones, but they don't have a home button.

I asked my orphan friend what his movie is, he said "Spiderman: No Way Home." I said, "Probably because it's so relatable, right?" He started crying. I don't know why.

A Russian, a Brit, and a terrorist are in an air balloon.

First, the Russian says, "I dare to throw a stone down!" So he does that, but the others don't seem to be impressed. So the Brit says, "I dare to throw a brick down!" So again he does that, the Russian is impressed, but the terrorist laughs and says, "I dare to throw a bomb down!" So he does that and everybody can't believe what they have just seen. So a bit further, they land, and a shocked and afraid little boy comes running up to them. So they ask what happened, on which the little boy said, "I farted and my school exploded."

If you buy two condoms, but you're banging a woman, it's fine, don't throw it away, just make her transgender.

I dunno man, worked for me.