Dog jokes
Why did the dog walk out at night?
To scare his people!
What has 8 legs and 2 ears? A dog.
Q: Why couldn't the queer wist eating his hot dog?
A: Because it tasted like shit.
What's a dog's dream car? A Dachshund 240Z.
What is a dog that you can drive?
A big doggy car.
What do you get when you are hungry? A dog to eat.
What did one dog say to another dog? I love you.
If you are wondering where the dog went, I don't know. Maybe he went barking around.
What's the difference between a Doberman Pinscher and a Social Worker?
Eventually, you can get a baby back from a Doberman Pinscher.
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions, which made me cry.
Onions was a good dog.
What has four legs and one arm?
A rottweiler at a park.
What do royals and hot dogs have in common?
They're usually in bread.
Person: Where do I commit suicide?
Dog: Roof.
Person: Good idea.
What’s the difference between a cat and a dog?
It’s easier to throw a cat against the wall.
I named my dog Chicken.
I love eating chicken.
My friend has a dog who looks like cocoa. Her name is Cocoa!
What is the difference between babies and dogs?
I don't eat dog parts.
A family had a very disobedient dog. It would bite the children’s hands when they pet the animal, the dog would piss on everything, and it would chew their shoes. This is why it was adopted.
I was setting a voice recognition password for my new phone, and a dog nearby barked and ran away. Now I'm still looking for that dog to unlock my phone.
What did the female dog say to the mirror?
Hi, bitch!