DOE jokes
Why does dark humor love orphans? Because the humor killed their parents.
How many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
More than 10, since my basement's still dark.
Why does JD Vance not need a conviction?
His running mate has 34 of them!
What do an X-Box and Michael Jackson have in common? They're both made of plastic and little kids turn them on.
How many orphans does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they don't even got a home.
How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? 10, 1 to change the lightbulb, 9 to talk about how inspired they are?
How does NASA organize a party?
They planet.
What does Michael Jackson and maths have in common? They're both hard for kids.
What does Michael Jackson and Jeffery Dahmer have in common?
They both enjoy kids' company.
What does a piece of gum and a gun have in common?
You pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
What kind of car does Jesus drive?
A Christler.
How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common They both get laid by Mexicans
Why does the mushroom 🍄 have many friends?
Because it’s a fungi.
What does it sound like when a dragon sings? A fire alarm.
Where does a crayon go on vacation? To color-ado.
Why does a queen have more mobility than the king in chess?
Because the board looks like a kitchen floor.
How many feminists does it take to fix a lightbulb?
9: one to screw the lightbulb, one to film it, one to post about it on a women empowerment social media page, one to complain that the man didn’t screw the lightbulb, one to say that women deserve to screw more lightbulbs, one to try to get #womenlightbulbscrewers trending on Twitter, one to bring a man and show him the screwing, one to say that women are better than men at screwing lightbulbs, and one to make a speech about the lightbulb.
I went to a sleepover at my best friend's house. He lives with his grandpa and little brother, his mom and dad. His little brother likes to run around the house naked sometimes. I can't help but notice his grandpa always looks up when he does.
How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just Juan.