What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.
DOE Jokes
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
What do the Titanic and the Montréal Canadiens have in common? They both sank to the bottom of the Atlantic.
What does a cow say? Moo.
What show does an orphan hate? Family Feud.
What part of a computer system does an orphan not have?
A motherboard.
Why does USA suck at Clash Royale? They already lost two towers.
What does a cigar and a hamster have in common?
Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.
What does a Rubik's cube and a man's penis have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
Why does Sans say "I got a bone to pick with you?"
Because he needs to pick your balls.
What movie does an orphan hate?
- No Way Home.
What does the handicapped man say to the cops when he’s mistaken for a criminal: "Don't shoot, I'm unarmed!"
If you eat her out on her period, does that make you Cunt Dracula?
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
Don't be stupid, feminists can't change anything.
What commitment does a pimp make to each new hoe he turns out?
Answer: He will always be there for her after the break-in period.
Why does Waldo wear stripes?
'Cause he doesn't want to be spotted.
If having sex for money makes you a wh*re, then what does having sex for free make you?
Non-profit wh*reganisation.
What does my arm have in common with paper?
They both can be cut.
"Babe, is it in?" "Yeah." "Does it hurt?" "Uh-huh." "Let me put it in slowly." "It still hurts." "Okay, let's try another shoe size."
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change the bulb and one to suck my dick.
