DOE jokes
One Tuesday afternoon, Little Jonny decides he wants extra homework, so he went to his teacher and said, "Hello, can I have extra homework this week?"
The teacher replied with, "Sure, be at my house Friday afternoon to cut my lawn, polish the counters, scrub the baseboards, scrub and paint the walls!"
And Johnny replied with, "That's not what I meant, but at least I'll get paid!"
The teacher said, "How about $200 each job?"
Johnny replied with, "OK."
Friday afternoon at her house, after Johnny does all the jobs, he asked for his payment and the teacher laughed and said, "You do know that Tuesday was April Fools' Day, right?"
What does a kid who has autism and reading have in common?
Absolutely nothing.
How many babies does it take to paint a barn red? Depends on how hard you throw them.
How does Helen Keller smell?
Pretty bad, she's dead!
Why does the Sun go to school?
Why does an orphan go to church?
So they can call someone "father."
Why do orphans become bullies?
Because their mum and dad were never there for them.
Why does Peter Pan always fly?
'Cause he Neverlands.
"Does this make any cents?" a man says.
"Oh, it does make cents," me. <-- thing: Lemin"aid" <-- another joke.
What does a waiter in a Chinese restaurant call a customer that won't leave a tip? A "plick."
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Joy.
What type of candy does the most magic?
Twix!
Eibar-Man! Eibar-Man! Does whatever a ghost can.
Scores a tapin With Xaviesta’s assistance. Misses a pen From close distance.
Lookout! Here comes the Eibar-man!
Why does an orphan cry when we say "ur mom?"
Because they have no mom.
How many babies does it take to cover a brick wall?
Depends on how hard you throw it. 😆😂😁
What is something an orphan's phone does not have?
Home buttons.
What does NASA stand for? Nobody Asked, Someone Answered.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
I don't know, either. It depends on how hard you throw them.
How does a rapper make a burrito?
With WRAPPING paper, DUUUHHHHHH!
How does a rapper start his day?
With a MIC check!