DOE jokes

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Masturbation

  • Please folks, you can hit the thumbs up button on the ones you like. There is no need to repost.

    Anyways,

    Knock knock Who's there? Can I come in? Can I come in who? Can I Come In You!?

    More often than not, I will cry when I masturbate. Some nights I'm a real tear jerker!

    But on the nights and I smoke a lil pot and then masturbate, my dad ends up bugging me because I am a weed wacker.

    How do you keep a dog from humping your leg? Pick him up and suck his dick.

    How does Popeye keep his manly part from rusting? He sticks it in Olive Oil.

    Snow White and the seven dwarfs are in the the tub feeling "HAPPY". Happy got out now they are fucking "GRUMPY".

    What's worse than waking up and finding a "Penis" drawn on your forehead? Finding out it was "Traced".

    If I had a rooster and you had a donkey and your donkey ate my rooster what would you have? 3 feet of my cock up your ass.

    Did you know Batman was actually Black? Yeah he couldn't go a night with out Robyn!

    Did you hear Gods Word Of The Day? Its Legs! Now lets go out and spread them.

    What do you call a Mexican woman with no legs? Cunt-sway-low

    Whats worse than sucking 25 oysters out of your Grandmas Pussy? Realizing you only put in 15.

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    Food

  • The Chinese food owner always brings us free food. I ask my sister why he does that. My sister said, "Love him long time."

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  • Homework

  • One Tuesday afternoon, Little Jonny decides he wants extra homework, so he went to his teacher and said, "Hello, can I have extra homework this week?"

    The teacher replied with, "Sure, be at my house Friday afternoon to cut my lawn, polish the counters, scrub the baseboards, scrub and paint the walls!"

    And Johnny replied with, "That's not what I meant, but at least I'll get paid!"

    The teacher said, "How about $200 each job?"

    Johnny replied with, "OK."

    Friday afternoon at her house, after Johnny does all the jobs, he asked for his payment and the teacher laughed and said, "You do know that Tuesday was April Fools' Day, right?"

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