DOE jokes

What does the school shooter do after he shoots a victim? He shoots more kids in them!

How much does a chimney cost?

It's free cause it's on the house.

How does a hillbilly mother know when her daughter is on her period? Her son’s dick tastes like blood.

What does Stephen Hawking put his food in? A microwave.

Why does Johnny Sins cover his pants, but it doesn't work?

Because the long, hard thing can't chirp down.

Tell it to your parents and friends!

What does a terrorist do when they see a twin?

They fly a plane at them.

Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?

Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.

Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!

Stacy: lol

How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three, because it’s the normal person's height.

How does an emo kid compliment one another?

Like your cuts, G.

What does the mom (or terrorists, fuck that) say for the (twin) towers to eat?

Open wide, here comes the plane!

Q: When does a pentagon have four sides?

A: When it's intersected by a plane!

What do blind kids and orphans have in common?

Neither of them can see their parents.

What does Batman have that Superman doesn't?

The ability to visit his biological parents' grave.

Why does an orphan have an iPhone XR for their first phone?

Because it doesn’t have a home button.

Bro, why does Ohio look like Fallout 4?

Why does the Tower of Pisa lean?

Because it has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.

Why does the orphan can’t write a single word or sentence?

Because the orphan is dumber.

What kind of food does a lesbian love? Anything they can eat out.

What does an apple and an orphan have in common?

One gets picked.

What does a blind man and a PS4 have in common?

They both need to make sounds to be recognized.