DOE jokes
What does cake and baseball have in common?
They both need a batter.
Your mom does not need the internet. She's already worldwide.
What does a "Smart Russian" and a "Unicorn" have in common?
Answer: Non-existence!
What does a pumpkin need when it's hurt? A pumpkin patch.
How many emos does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they just sit and cry in the dark.
This Mfer soooo greedy he does NOT need that much tail
Does that neverending forehead of yours go all the way to Mars, holy fucking shit?
What does your mom say when she is working?
Nothing, it's rude to talk with your mouth full.
What do the initials "MAD" stand for?
Mothers Against Democrats.
How does a woman scare their gynecologist?
By becoming a ventriloquist.
What does the long distance call and a Black person have in common?
They both don’t work.
How does a rapper keep their money safe?
In a RAP VAULT.
How does a rapper apologize?
With a rap-ology!
What does Leo have in common with a newspaper?
They both love to yap and babble, and they always get fondled by old people.
How many emos does it take to fix a lightbulb?
None, because they just cry in the darkness.
What does a doctor do to make you better?
Helium.
Where does Stephen Hawking go when he breaks his arm? PC World.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends how hard you throw them.
Does anybody know the similarities between a Rubik's cube and a penis?
I don't know the whole answer, but I do know that the more you play with it, the harder it gets.
What does the egg do after the pan told him a joke?
He cracked up!
How does a cow do math?
With a cow-culator!