DOE jokes
Why does an orphan want to be a prostitute?
Because they want to call someone "daddy."
An American walks into an Afghan bar. Joke, Afghanistan doesn't have bars because of the Taliban.
What does an iPhone have that orphans do not?
Home buttons.
How does the cheetah do in every race?
It’s always a cheetah.
How many heterosexual men does it take to change a lightbulb in heaven?
Both of them.
when Queen Elizabeth does her evil face when she hates someone : be like :'/
When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?
When he is on the train.
What do the Twin Towers and school have in common?
People jumped off a building to escape it.
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
What does Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
Kids turn them on.
Two hotdogs are walking across the street. One is walking slow. What does the 2nd one say?
"Ketchup!"
What do Nelson Mandela and Paul Walker have in common?
They both died at 95.
Why does an orphan play mum and dad?
'Cause they need self-love.
1. What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho cheese.
2. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ash. Ash who? Achoo!
3. How does the ocean say hello? He waves.
4. Why can't Elsa have a balloon? Because she will let it go.
5. What do you call your enemy? You don't call it at all.
What kind of milk does a new age calf drink?
Dairy free.
Sans, you lazybones, get up and do something.
Sans: I am doing something.
Papyrus: Oh yeah, what?
Sans: Thinking up a skele-ton of jokes.
Papyrus: SANSSSsSsSsSssSsSSsSsSsSSsSSsSsSsS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will end you.
Sans: What, does someone not have a funny bone? Oh wait, do you have a bone to pick with me? I have 206.
How do you suck a dick?
Stick it down your throat like Nicholas does with Dennis.
What does a robot do after a one night stand?
He nuts 'n bolts!
What does an emo kid and an apple have in common?
They both are hanging.
So I added Paul Walker on Xbox the other day, and it’s annoying cause all he does is sit on the dashboard.
One day Little Johnny’s class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?” Little Mary says, “The teacher is very intelligent.” The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?” Little Suzie says, “They are very fashionable.” The teacher says, “Johnny, why don’t you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence.” Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy, ‘Darling, how does my dick taste?’”