Dishwasher jokes

Yo, so poor that you wash your paper plates and cutlery in a kids' dishwasher.

Marriage is really educational.

When I was single, I didn't even know there was a wrong way to put a fork in the dishwasher.

I was in class and we had to choose another term for words we use everyday. For kid, I chose "child"; for dog, I chose "pet"; and for wife, I chose "dishwasher."

Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?

I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...

There was a woman. She is property. Ha, sucks for that dishwasher.

Mom: Don't forget to unload the dishwasher.

Mom: Did you finish your homework?

Mom: We are going to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving.

Mom: Dad and I talked. We are getting a new car next month.

Son: You are?? Oh my gosh, thank you!

Mom: No, I was just making sure you were getting my texts.

Son: That was cruel!

There was a big problem yesterday.

My dishwasher has stopped working; her visa had expired.

A man ordered a washing machine because his old one stopped working. As soon as the man opened his new washing machine, he immediately rejoiced because there was a woman inside. Without hesitation, the man yelled, "FREE DISHWASHER!"

What do you call an epileptic in a swimming pool? A dishwasher.

What do you do if your dishwasher stops working?

Punch her in the face and remind her of her duties.

What do you do when your dishwasher breaks down?

You punch her in the face and remind her of her duties.

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Slap it on the arse and tell it to keep going!

My dishwasher is broke.