Disabled jokes
How does a disabled kid walk to school?
He wishes he had the facilities to.
What is the worst comedy for disabled people?
Stand-up comedy!
What did Steven Hawking say when the WiFi cut out?.........Nothing.
"Oh, hey guys, do you know I saw a guy with dementia?"
"Oh, hey guys, do you know I saw a guy with dementia?"
"Oh, hey, do you know I saw a guy with dementia?"
How do you name a disabled Asian?
Throw the wheelchair down the stairs.
I walked up to a man, and he said, "How's the weather up there?" and then I pushed him into the street to get hit by a bus.
Why did the one-handed man cross the road?
To get to the second-hand store!
I love taking my daughter out in the car. Every time we go over a speed bump, I tell her we ran over another dog. 😂
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome who plays basketball?
Dribble.
I parked in a disabled space today...
...and a traffic warden shouted to me, “Oi, what's your disability?” I said “Tourettes! Now fuck off!”
What's simultaneously up and down?
A retard on a plane.
Is a disabled person who has no arms but has guns armed or not armed?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
Why does no one look up at Steven Hawking?
You have to look down to see him.
I saw a disabled person in the super market. They were at the vegetable aisle.
Why did Annie fall from the swing?
Because she had no hands.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Annie.
My handicapped friend was getting bullied. I said, "Just stand up for yourself!"
Today I was at PE, and I saw a kid in a wheelchair. I threw a basketball at him, and I yelled, "Rocket League!"
What do you call a disabled Arab?
Artoo-Detoo (R2-D2).
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to the other side!