Disability jokes
what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a hot tub?
steamed vegetables.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She's retarded.
So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.
A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. ๐
I bought my cousin a trampoline, she started crying. She was in a wheelchair.
Whatโs the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? โJames Brown - Get on Upโ
Whatโs the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? โVan Halen - Jumpโ
What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? โI Can't Breathe - Juice Wrldโ
Memes
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Kid: "What's dark humor?"
Mom: "You see that man over there without arms? Tell him to clap."
Kid: "I am blind, Mom."
Mom: "Exactly."
Why did Helen Keller sign the n-word?
She thought she was black.
I've been trying to find jokes about gouging my eyes out, but I couldn't see any.
What's a Parkinson's victim's least favorite song?
Taylor Swift - "Shake it Off".
When you ask the cashiers for the specials menu, and they bring out the autistic kid, blind kid, and Down syndrome kid.
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.
Where do people with no legs go to have fun?
Legnoland.
Q: What was Hellen Keller's favorite game as a kid?
A: Musical chairs.
What was the one test Stephen Hawking couldn't pass? The beep test.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They put her in a circle room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
Why did Susie get cut from the soccer team? She has no legs!
Who broke into my house by kicking down my door? Not Susie... But she still is in my basement, since she can't run!
What's the worst part about hearing a special needs kid getting hit by a car?
Having to listen to the wheelchair scraping for a mile and a half.
What do you call physically handicapped, homophobic, heterosexual men and women in wheelchairs?
Mixed nuts.
What do you call a blind German? A Nazi (Not-see)!
Down Syndrome is already a joke.