Disability jokes

What's black and screams?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron.

what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a hot tub?

steamed vegetables.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She's retarded.

What's a Parkinson's victim's least favorite song?

Taylor Swift - "Shake it Off".

So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.

A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. 💀

I bought my cousin a trampoline, she started crying. She was in a wheelchair.

What’s the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? “James Brown - Get on Up”

What’s the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? “Van Halen - Jump”

What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? “I Can't Breathe - Juice Wrld”

Kid: "What's dark humor?"

Mom: "You see that man over there without arms? Tell him to clap."

Kid: "I am blind, Mom."

Mom: "Exactly."

Why did Helen Keller sign the n-word?

She thought she was black.

Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?

IHOP.

Where do people with no legs go to have fun?

Legnoland.

What was the one test Stephen Hawking couldn't pass? The beep test.

Q: What was Hellen Keller's favorite game as a kid?

A: Musical chairs.

I told a blind man to read more, so he grabbed my arm and read the whole dictionary.

What did the Asian parents say when they had a disabled kid?

Sum ting wong.

Why did Susie get cut from the soccer team? She has no legs!

Who broke into my house by kicking down my door? Not Susie... But she still is in my basement, since she can't run!

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They put her in a circle room and told her to find the penny in the corner.

What's the worst part about hearing a special needs kid getting hit by a car?

Having to listen to the wheelchair scraping for a mile and a half.

What do you call a blind German? A Nazi (Not-see)!

What do you call physically handicapped, homophobic, heterosexual men and women in wheelchairs?

Mixed nuts.