Disability jokes
Q. What's a disabled person's favorite band?
A. System of a Down's syndrome.
Surely people would consider putting pedals on wheelchairs so that their arms don't get tired.
Why did Steven Hawking not go to heaven after he died?
He could not get up the stairs?
A blind man walks into a bar... and a table... and a chair... and the counter.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
They unplugged the wifi.
Once upon a time, there was a woman named Sarah who woke up one morning to find her husband and his wheelchair missing. She searched high and low, but they were nowhere to be found. Desperate to find them, she put up posters all over town offering a reward.
What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs?
A paintball.
I can’t stand disabled jokes...
Neither can they 😂
What do you call a midget with autism?
A weetard.
What do you call a gay man that is not physically handicapped that performs blowjobs on gay men that are physically handicapped?
Caregiver.
People with Down syndrome have a specific skill only they have; they can give a blow job and talk to you while sounding exactly the same.
This one kid never stands up for the pledge of allegiance, and I'm tired of it.
Today, I push him out of his wheelchair.
What college can Stephen Hawking not attend?
"Stand" Ford University. :3
I'm so mad I got arrested for rape, even though the girl never said no. The prosecution said she was mute, but how was I supposed to know? She never told me.
Why was Helen Keller's belly button bruised?
Her boyfriend was blind too.
God: “Steven, join us.”
*sees the staircase to heaven*
Steven: “Shit.”
What did the orphan say to the crippled man?
I suffer from crippling depression.
What did the mute man tell the blind man?
Nothing.
When you ask the cashiers for the specials menu, and they bring out the autistic kid, blind kid, and Down syndrome kid.
When two wheelchairs hit each other, is it a fender bender?
Did you hear about the blind prostitute?
Well, you gotta hand it to her.