Disability jokes

Charity

I'm starting a new charity where homosexuals help the extremely handicapped.

I'm calling it "Fruits and Vegetables".

Drunk people

An Indian guy and an American guy in a wheelchair met in a bar for drinks.

The American guy got drunk and fell on the sidewalk.

The Indian guy got drunk and walked away.

Second-hand Store

I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store.

I said to him: "I don't think they have what you're looking for, sir."

Memes

Wheelchair

Once upon a time, there was a woman named Sarah who woke up one morning to find her husband and his wheelchair missing. She searched high and low, but they were nowhere to be found. Desperate to find them, she put up posters all over town offering a reward.

A yellow sign with black stripes. It says "Attention" at the top, followed by "Husband and wheelchair missing!" and "Reward for wheelchair". At the bottom there is small print "follow me on Instagram for more @goingonectwicesold".

Wife

Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?

She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.

  • 2
  • 1
  • Man

    There's a man in Florida with no arms or legs who is armed and on the run.

  • 0
  • Caregiver

    What do you call a gay man that is not physically handicapped that performs blowjobs on gay men that are physically handicapped?

    Caregiver.

    Wheelchair

    This one kid never stands up for the pledge of allegiance, and I'm tired of it.

    Today, I push him out of his wheelchair.

    Wheelchair

    My school is on fire today, and I pushed a kid in a wheelchair down the stairs and shouted, "Hot Wheels!"