Disability jokes
Did you hear about the blind prostitute?
Well, you gotta hand it to her.
What's better than winning gold at the Paralympics?
Not being retarded.
My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers.
To be honest, I should have seen the signs.
What is a retard's favorite race? The grand autismo.
Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms?
Because he told the man to put his hands up.
I bought a book for my blind friend.
When the school shooter is right outside the classroom window, and the autistic kid starts trying to say hello to him.
There's a man in Florida with no arms or legs who is armed and on the run.
A Down syndrome kid asks for an ice cream. The man asks, "Do you want sauce on it?"
The kid says, "It doesn’t matter, I’m going to drop it anyway!" 😂😂😂
What do you call a person with Down syndrome in a bathtub?
Vegetable soup.
Why is the German blind?
Because he's a "not see."
How do parents punish a blind kid? They rearrange the furniture.
If you ever get mad at a person that crumpled their leg, don't forget that they can hide, but they can't run.
I just went on a date with a woman in a wheelchair.
I stood her up, which made her fall for me. At first it was a drag, but now we’re rolling.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome on the beach?
A baked potato.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy?
Hot Wheels.
I told a crippled guy he is immortal because he can't kick the bucket.
A kid in a wheelchair got hurt yesterday. I got detention yesterday because I told him to walk it off.
I pushed the kid in the wheelchair down the hill, but before I did, I set his wheels on fire and called him "hot wheels."
Give a blind kid a torch and tell him it's a hairdryer.