Disability jokes
I ran over three disabled kids.
"Cripple kill."
How do you know when Helen Keller is home?
Answer: When you hear somebody falling down the stairs!
I put the sexy in dyslexia.
Why did Helen Keller burn her hands?
Because she was trying to read the waffle iron.
Brother: I bought my brother a trampoline today, the ungrateful fuck just sat in his wheelchair and cried.
What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one.
Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she. Did you see that one coming? Neither did she.
(She's blind and deaf)
What's the only part of a vegetable you cannot eat?
Wheelchair.
You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes.
How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree?
You wave at him.
You know when you sign up for something and it says "I'm not a robot"? I guess he never had the chance to tick that.
Did you hear that Stephen Hawking wrote a new book? It's called "Around The House in Eighty Days."
Unlike my syndrome, I keep my chin up. 🙌🏽😁
Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?
A: So she can moan with the other.
If a crippled man told stories about himself, would that be called VeggieTales?
What did the mentally retarded kid get on his test?
Drool.
I am disabled and I find these jokes appropriately hilarious.
What gang was Stephen Hawking in? The Crips.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal?
His shoulder.
I was beefing with a dude in a wheelchair, so I took his wheelchair and threw it across the street and told him, "Walk it off, you will be fine."