Disability jokes
What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
How do you kidnap Stephen Hawking?
Shut off his computer.
What does Stephen Hawking put his food in? A microwave.
Little Johnny has no arms. Knock, knock, who's there?
Not Johnny.
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I decided to take her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His PC overheated.
My speech impediment has gotten so worse that I stutter when typing sentences.
Stephen Hawking talks by clicks. Two clicks is "hi," and five is "dab me up."
I told Hellen Keller it was a hair dryer, little did she know it was a Glock.
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.
Stephen Hawking was incredible at poker, he had no tell whatsoever.
What instrument does a special ed kid play? An autistic guitar.
Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.
That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman:
What did the autistic man order at McDonald’s?
Ass Burgers.
What is the autistic woman’s favorite Dorito flavor?
Neurospicy.
Why do physically disabled gay men like performing blowjobs on well-endowed, abled-bodied gay men?
Because physically disabled gay men prefer eating pepperoni than eating sausage links for dinner 🍽
💪 💪 🏋️♂️ What do you get when you cross a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a bukkake slut, and a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a sex worker?
Cum Junkie.
What do you call a well endowed gay male who is also in a wheelchair?
Meals on wheels.
If a person with Down syndrome robs you, what do you say? “I’m up your Down.”
Numb Butt Wheelchair Club: No Feeling, No Problem!