Disability jokes
This one kid never stands up for the pledge of allegiance, and I'm tired of it.
Today, I push him out of his wheelchair.
What did the woman with no hands get for Christmas? No idea. She hasn't opened her present yet.
When the kid in the wheelchair scares you... you wheelie scared me.
What do you call a guy at your doorstep with no arms or legs? Matt.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
How does a disabled man go to church? He can't, there's no ramp.
Why did the blind man get killed? Because he never saw it coming.
He was in a fight, then a person said, "Stand up for yourself!"
He was saying jokes, and someone said, "You are on a roll!"
Helen Keller walked into a bar...
And into a table, and into a chair.
What did the blind kid get for his birthday?
I don't know, he still didn't look.
I dumped the dead, disabled person's body into a dumpster full of rats.
How do you make a disabled person cry?
Let's go play tag!
I pushed the disabled kid into a fire, then called him "Hot Wheels."
Who was the meanest man in the world?
He raped Helen Keller and threw her down a well, but not before cutting off her fingers so she couldn't yell for help.
What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."
Stop making jokes about people in wheelchairs. They can't stand up for themselves.
Who is the blindest person in the world?
My handicapped friend was getting bullied. I said, "Just stand up for yourself!"
Stop it! What if a blind person sa- oh wait, never mind, carry on.