Difference jokes
What's the difference between me and a registered sex offender?
I am not registered.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One's plastic and dangerous to play with; the other is to carry groceries.
What's the difference between my wife and a battery? I can't use a battery when it dies.
What's the difference between Jesus and the baby I have in my basement?
Jesus died a virgin.
What's the difference between a Mexican and a book?
The book has papers.
He was telling the truth in a different way...
The fact that I am high won't stop me from advising you.
Don't plug your phone while charging it; it is very dangerous.
What's the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
What's the difference between America and a bottle of milk?
In 200 years the milk will have developed a culture.
What’s the difference between a feminist and a rock?
A rock can break a glass ceiling.
What’s the difference between a mother and a fetus at an abortion office?
Only one of them is scared.
What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange?
I don't keep a trash bag full of oranges in my basement.
What's the difference between a gay and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What's the difference between a penis and a gun?
A child doesn't cry when a gun goes off in its mouth.
What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.
What is the difference between an old chest and a kid? One doesn't cry when you drop it in the basement.
What is the difference between a cow and me?
Nothing.
What’s the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
What's the difference between a parachute and a coffin?
One brings you safely to the ground, and the other is a last resort when you've already hit it.
What's the difference between a frog and a skyscraper? The frog can jump. Hahahahaha!
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.