I was at school one day, and my teacher gave me homework. Once I got home, I did not do my homework, but I watched TV. After the movie, I finally went to go do my homework. I was almost done with my homework when I got to the last question. I didn't know the answer, so I asked the closest living being to me, which was my dog, and I asked him: what's two minus two? He said nothing.
Didnt Jokes
(First Person): Knock knock, who's there? (2nd Person): Lemme talk to you, when we finna slide, what we finna do, knock knock, who's there, time to make a move, slayin' all then demons and we gotta move in too.
(Second Person): Knock knock, (1st p): who's there, let me talk to you, be careful where you steppin' out cause you ain't bullet proof, knock knock, who's there? time to make a move, block is full of shooters, and they didn't come to hoop.
Why didn't the squirrel want to go swimming? Because he didn't want to get his nuts wet!
Why is the Pentagon mad?
Because it didn't get two pizzas, but only one plane pizza.
Why didn't the orphan do the work?
Because when the teacher says they would call your mum or dad, there's nobody to call.
A depressed guy walks into a utensil store and finds a knife, but he didn't stab himself... Part 2 coming out tomorrow.
Why did the skeleton run away from the crime scene?
He didn't have the guts to see it.
If someone told me to bring up 9/11, they were trying to make a funny joke, but it didn't work.
That one really *crashed and burned*.
Why did Sally drown in the pool?
She didn't have any arms, remember!
My girlfriend didn't bring me the sandwich, so I brought the gas.
Why can you say "Kobe" even though you missed?
Because he didn't land either.
Q: Why didn't the Oak tree win the election?
A: He didn't get the votes he was oaking for, because he was not the popular vote.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana again?
Because all I do is pound it, man, I would put you on my 600 lb life if you didn't weigh a thousand.
I tried to fight a razor. It cut me so deep I thought I would die.
Turns out he didn't kill me. I was never happy, but that shit made me angry.
My bad, but you stink so bad you passed by a trashcan and it yelled, "Wow! I didn't know I had family!"
Why didn't the dog want to play football??
'Cause he was a boxer!
My mom said my sister was an angel, but when I threw her out the window, she didn't fly.
TAOST, you didn't submit it, you fuck!
Your hairline is so far back, your barber didn't know where to start.