Di jokes

My grandpa died to ligma :(

LIGMA BALLS!

I'm glad Stephen Hawking died because he was wheely wheely bad.

Yo momma so fat she died at 5. Her kids, f

* * *

Dwarfism is a growing problem.

Kidding, that’s not funny. My friend died of dwarfism.

He jumped off a curb stone.

I read the Brothers Grimm books, then I see a black figure reaping about.

I realized someone has died, but I don't do anything about it. I continue to read, and that's when I realized that I was one of the characters, in which at the end, dies.

What was the last thing to go through Princess Diana’s head before she died?

The steering wheel.

My friend's mom died, and he also died in a crash.

Do you love God?

My dad died when we couldn’t remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting for us to “be positive,” but it’s hard without him.

I was at a funeral. I kissed a hot girl I did not know. She was the one that died.

Stephen Hawking died because he lost his WiFi connection.

Your mama is so stupid, when her phone died, she bared it, lol.

How did Stephen Hawking die?

He didn't have enough room for any more RAM on his motherboard. I feel so bad for saying that!

My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”

I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”

I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”

Once upon a time lived a fat ass named Steve and got rabies and died. The end!

I was reading a book one day when I suddenly heard a sound. It was the Grim Reaper. I ignored it and continued reading my book. Suddenly, I realized that I was one of the main characters, which, at the end, dies.

I used to like fireworks, but I'm dead now. Fireworks look like a charm if you don't mind something a little ghostly.

What lies beneath your nose and is being picked on? Your boogers.

Yo mama so fat, she died!

What were Brian Cant's last words before he died?

"I used to do it, but now I cant!"

Wanna know why Stephen Hawking died?

He lost his Wi-Fi connection.

Stephen Hawking died because he got hacked by me, and the update was too strong.