Depression jokes
A man is depressed and he sighs. A bully says, "Stop sighing, you sound like some guys having a threesome!"
Friend: Hi!
Me: Who are you?
Friend: ...your friend?
Me: What are you talking about? The doctor already said I couldn’t have any.
You know how to draw a horse? If not, look in a mirror and draw what you see.
Are you a highway? Because I wanna lay on you.
Why can’t the emo play in trees? They’ll leave ‘em hanging.
"Go big or go home," that’s what some people say.
"Go loud and proud," that’s what other people say.
"Go out with a big, loud bang!" that’s what I say.
If an emo and a leaf are in a tree, which one will fall first?
Answer: The leaf. The rope saved the emo.
Happiness belonged to you, then gave you depression.
Hey everyone, I'm back because I'm sinking back towards depression because my sister is really being a bitch, and my parents always side with her, and the stress over online school is just getting overwhelming, and I'm seriously considering hanging myself to end it all because the pain is just... terrible, and I feel like I'm not worth life.
An emo and a leaf fall out of a tree. Which hits the ground first? The leaf. The rope stopped the emo.
What do you call a cat with two legs instead of four?
Dead and without use, that's what I feel like.
What will make a depressed teenager happy?
A cliff.
Mom says: "I will go kill myself."
Me: *stays quiet cuz knows better than to talk* *also me internally eyerolls*
Some time later me fighting with my mom:
Me to my mom: "Oh, yea than kill me!"
Mom: "What the hell did you just say? I don't want to hear it from you again!"
Lesson?
So it's OK for adults to say "I'll kill myself" but not teens/kids!?!?
Why do I love a block? Because I can fall off the stairs.
What's a dead person's favorite sentence?
"I made it."
Listen, my friends say I am gay, but I tell them I am not because I am not happy. In fact, I have no life. You are my friend. I trust you with my life. Now, can you take it?
Did you hear about the octopus who went emo? He sliced all 8 of his wrists.
What is the difference between me and food?
Food has a use.
A man came up to a girl about to jump off a cliff. The man said, "Why?" She then replies, "There are many monsters in this world, and I am one of them."
What do us emos all have in common?
Depression. Anxiety. The sole desire to just start saying you wanna kys right out of the blue a lot and saying "I CAN'T WAIT TO JUMP OF THAT BUILDING SOON!" and other people say, "Idgaf, do it, all of us would be happy."