Depression

Depression jokes

Emo

What falls first from a tree, an apple or an emo?

The apple... the emo just hangs there.

Quitter

Just because you‘re suicidal, you don‘t have to be a quitter.

Wait, actually.

Cheer

When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to just cheer up, god damn, why didn't I think of that?

Internet meme

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Emo

Why do emos like circles? Because they can hang out with them.

Dog

Why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide?

Well, I wouldn't want to be named "asdjasdjasdak" either.

Apple

What falls to the ground first if an apple and an emo kid fall from a tree?

The apple because the rope caught the emo kid.

Mom

Mom: That's why your dad left you.

Me: Why?

Mom: I mean look at you, depressed, suicidal, and unhappy, always anxious, and other mental health issues.

Me: How is that my fault? You are a rude mom!

Mom: Your dad had a heart attack two weeks before you were born, because you are ugly!

(This actually did happen in real life.)

Emo

The first thing the emo did at the party is to pin the gun to their head.

Bro

(Me) Hey bro, tell me a joke!

(My friend) Your mom. *Starts Laughing*

(Me) *Fakes laughs* *then points a gun at him*

At this moment, he knew he fucked up.

Crack

If depression on crack fucked weed and 69 hours of not sleeping and had a baby with huge amounts of autism, that would be me.

Body

Read this and you're gay.

Depression has been entered into your body.

Life

Friend: Knock knock.

Me: Who's there?

Friend: Your life.

Me: Ahhh, I wish!

*jumps off building*

Moment

The moment when you're too depressed to fantasize about death--it's so tiring.

Emo

Why do emos hang themselves? Because no one wants to hang around them.

Tree

Why do trees never call Emos? Because they always hang up on them.