Depression jokes
I always sucked at mazes. I found myself lost over and over again, but if life is a labyrinth, I'd always find the escape. The final dead end, my personal favorite...
Depression, I got it.
A girlfriend, don't got it.
A life, don't got it.
Help, got it.
Friends, don't got it.
Family, I got it.
Best of all, depression, I got it!!!!!!
If it's true what they say and I quote, "God never gives you more than you can handle," then you should pray to those who didn't, that God gave them a body strong enough to survive the attempt.
What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.
Sleep, but make it forever.
My mom told me a joke she made 13 years ago, but she didn't tell me what it was... Anyways, I'm turning 14 next month.
What music do depressed people listen to?
"I Believe I Can Fly."
When the depressed kid runs out of eyeliner, so he says "fruit ninja" with his wrists.
My ex-boyfriend tried to scan himself at the supermarket checkout for fun.
“See how I can’t scan myself? It’s because I’m priceless.”
I decided I’d scan my wrist too, just for fun.
Found out I’m worth $3.97.
There's nothing else that can beat up dog.
What's up, dog?
Just my depression!
What time do you think dogs are not happy?
Bulldogs.
When I get suicidal, everyone worries. I don't know why because that is when I'm the happiest, thinking about death.
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
I had to stop using cutting jokes because they were getting too deep.
For me, the best part of depression is remaining charming around strangers but saving the misery for the ones who love you.
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.
On the plus side, I finally hear voices talking to me... just wish they were outside my head.
Really feeling suicidal is basically having a mental breakdown, but realizing you have nothing nice and sharp to use.
Why do depressed people go to camp? To learn how to tie knots tighter.
My teacher called me beautiful. I hate when she lies.