Depression jokes
The depressed kid at school tried giving the tree a high five.
It left him hanging.
I was happy for once, and my family was happy I was happy, but that all changed when they found out I was thinking about bridges and humans.
I'm worth something, I got a barcode on my arm!
When you're depressed about the world :( but you remember you will soon die :)
How long does it take for a depressed person to change a light bulb?
5 days. & I’m pretty proud of myself.
Friend #1: "What's your favourite thing about trees?"
Friend #2: "Apples"
Me: "I can hang myself in them."
It's Christmas morning, and all the decorations are done, but the tree looks like it's missing something. *grabs the noose*
Have you ever observed the depression cycle of a snail?
It's pretty much a downward spiral.
My fucking life, cya.
What do you get when I get mixed with coffee?
De-presso.
Twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope I'll get hit by a car. I am not dead yet, I hope I'll die. I hope I'll be born to a new whole life.
Nobody: Aww, that's so sad!
Me: Just like me.
The doctor told me I'm color blind...
Me: That's out of the purple!
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
Why am I still alive?
Pills give me stomachaches, blood makes me faint, height frightens me...
when you see a depressed kid, you walk up and say "wassup my lil barcode"
what came first, The apple or the girl? The apple, because the tree left her hanging :)
(demons in my head) I laugh to meet them...
Roses are red, violets are blue, the last time people got depressed ended World War II.
More expresso, less depresso. Jk, let's all drink bleach cuz life is a bitch.