Depression Jokes

if an emo doesn't get better by Christmas Santas reindeer won't be the only thing jumping off roofs this year

I tried to get my bloood sucked by a vampire, but he said I was too empty inside

Why are we depressed, is it because that bully in your school, or that you have acne, how about when you listen to you sad song playlist, maybe cause you have no friends, Or is it the fact your anime girlfriend is fake. T^T

Teacher: People with Depression never get anywhere in life. Student 1: My mom has depression, but she died. Student 2: My sister has depression and she's going to Therapy. Student 3: My Dad Has depression, and he's Doing REALLY Well

I was watching my boyfriends dog while he took a shower. I started playing fetch with the him when the ball went over the balcony. He went to get it and fell 10 stories. When i looked down, he appeared to be dead. My boyfriend loved his dog and I didn't know what to do ,so feeling awful, I sat on the couch and waiting for him to come back. About three minutes later he got out of the shower. He ordered some food and went to the table to eat when I said ,”you know , your dogs been a little depressed lately...”

Doctor : what makes you feel depressed? Me: I used to work at the word trade centre, before the plane hit. Doctor: a lot of people fell to pieces after that.

What's great about an emo pizza? It cuts its self yay

Do you know why i wish grass was emo, so it can cut itself.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants... I hope they're happy now 😐

What's a depressed person's favorite drink? A depresso espresso.

It's cyanide.

They said I was depressed, I should make an effort to do what I love. I had to pay a hooker for, twelve hours work. ... I felt nothing, but its was nice, being with someone who felt the same.

Why doesn't my egg wants to crack? Because I hate my egg-sistence.

Scientists say I'm made up of 75% of water

But after jumping in the ocean its 100%just like my depression.

What's the difference between parents and depression? At least one of them leaves you.

Where did jonny go during the bombing Everywhere

Everything I fall in love with leaves me. Maybe if I fall in love with my depression, it'll leave me too.

Most people say I'm a clown. Yet they don't laugh at my jokes. Most people avoid me, because I'm a "clown". Yet I'm not the center of the circus. But I know I'm gonna be a clown forever. Because I can't take this damn mask off, no matter how hard I try.

Weeks later: Finally I found out why I'm being called a clown...because my smiling face is fake...