Depression jokes
Roses are red, my blood is too. I see a lot when I lost you.
"Go big or go home," that's what some people say.
"Go loud and proud," that's what other people say.
"Go out with a big, loud bang!" that's what I say.
The difference between my life and a joke is that a joke has meaning.
Are you suicide, 'cause you're always on my mind?
Everything disappears in the Bermuda Triangle.
Except my depression.
You know what flowers and depressed people have in common?
Both end up getting cut.
Teacher: "People with depression never get anywhere in life."
Student 1: "My mom has depression, but she died."
Student 2: "My sister has depression and she's going to therapy."
Student 3: "My dad has depression, and he's doing REALLY well."
What's both red, white and sometimes purple?
My arms...
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.
What’s the difference between an apple and a depressed kid? The apple falls from the tree.
What is the easiest line to draw in the hospital?
My heartbeat.
I wish I could say that my life is a joke, but I can't because jokes have a meaning.
Smile, because it confuses people. Smile, because it’s easier than explaining what is killing you inside.
If you’ve got depression, then your life is a joke. Everyone laughs at both.
What does an apple and a lawyer have in common?
They both look good hanging from a tree.
What did the orphan say to the crippled man?
I suffer from crippling depression.
I wish I could be as visible as my depression is.
I love Brussel sprouts more than I love myself.
Me and a person downtown.
Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night.
Me: I guess so.
Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this?
Me: I don't know. I used to, but don't anymore.
Person: Why'd you stop?
Me: Unfortunately, I lived every time I'd try something.
what's a depressed person's favorite game?
hangman