Death jokes
Me: I fucked your mom.
Orphan: I don't have a mom so you fucked the air.
There's something special about cemeteries.
People are dying to get inside.
Orphan's prayer: In the name of the Father, The Son, The Holy Spirit. Amen.
What's worse than finding one dead baby in a bin? Finding one dead baby in five bins.
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
Memes
Why did Princess Di cross the road?
Momentum.
Cremation, the last chance to have a smoking hot body.
I still remember my granddad's last words,
"Are you still holding the ladder?"
What's worse than one dead baby in a trash can?
One dead baby in ten trash cans.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled away and his charger unplugged.
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.
Two skeletons meet at the graveyard at noon.
"What the heck are you doing here?"
"I couldn't sleep."
How did Steven Hawking die?
He forgot his log on password.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Windows didn’t update in time.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Your dead son.
My grandfather was the type of person who never threw anything away.
He died in World War II holding on to a hand grenade.
Rip Juice WRLD.
I got written up on "Take Your Daughter To Work Day." Apparently, it only applies to daughters who are alive.
God creates dog.
God: "You are man's best friend."
Dog: "That's pretty sexist."
God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"
Dog: "....."
God: "And chocolate kills you!"
Dog: "🐶"