Death jokes
George Floyd was in a TV show, Fresh Prince, with no air.
How do skeletons get COVID?
From the coffin!
Boy: "My girlfriend didn't dump me, I dumped her..."
Off the nearby cliff.
You see a cat, it's dead, you are dead.
A pilot is having a talk with one of his passengers. The passenger asks, "Why did you become a pilot?" The pilot replies with, "To face my fears." The passenger then says, "You're afraid of heights?" "No, I'm afraid of dying alone."
Why did mommy disappear? The dad: Well, when she crossed the road to get to the chicken, she only made it halfway.
I'd tell you a Kobe joke.
But I am afraid it wouldn't land well.
Kobe Bryant jokes just don't really fly well now.
Orphan: My mommy and daddy love me.
Guy: Where are they then?
Orphan: In the eternal depths of [hell].
Orphans: Where are my parents?
Random person: In the bed.
My friend came over to my house. He asked where my girlfriend was, and I told him she is in the garden.
He said, "That's weird, I didn't see her." I said, "You have to dig a little."
I still remember my grandpa's last words: "Turn the lawn mower off!"
Man dies.
What hits the ground first, the feather or the emo?
The feather, because the emo is hung in the tree.
My grandpa unplugged the AC, so I unplugged his life support.
Do I like playing Russian Roulette? Gun to the head, I'd have to say no.
They laughed at my crayon drawing.
I laughed at their chalk outline.
My wife walked in on me cheating on her and said, "How could you cheat on me?!" I said, "She was lying naked on the table what I was supposed to do?" and my wife responded with, "Perform the autopsy."
What's the difference between a cop and a bullet?
When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.
Just noticed something: all celebrities die badly except for Elvis. He had a relief after Taco Bell.