Dais jokes

2001/9/11, that day was fire.

I don’t see why people say that emo kids don’t like to hangout. I seen them hanging all day.

My grandpa was the best soldier ever. He gunned down over 100 soldiers in his bunker during D-Day.

I've recently been treated with Asthma and have been prescribed penicillin. One day I was taking it and a man screaming "SUIII" came into the room and stole it! He thought the penicillin would give him penalties. I couldn't breathe, shame on you Penaldo for ruining my life!

Who needs Singles Day when you're single for the rest of your life!

One morning I saw three kids were bullying one other kid because they didn't have a dad...

Later that day the three same kids were walking toward an orphanage. :)

Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?

Friend: Why?

Me: Because they don't have a mother or father's day.

One day, I was walking through a park when I realized it was crowded.

To this day, I still don't know who let the children out of my basement.

Why do orphans only have 354 days?

'Cause they are missing Mothers and Fathers day!

I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...

Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...

I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...

When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.

I was walking down the street one day, and I passed the gun store. I walked in, and everything was half off. I didn’t know back-to-school sales had started already!

A teenage girl got a summer job dogsitting for a gigantic English Mastiff. She spent hours with the dog, and walked a little funny when she got home.

"What are you doing all day?"

"Knot a lot."

Hope everyone is having a good day! ❤️

You're walking one day and a little kid, about 5-6 years old, comes up to you asking, "What's a condom?" You have to give that child the wrong answer, what would you tell them? Comment on what you would tell them.

One day I was saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, “Yeah, what gave me away?” I said, “His parents.”

Give a man a potato, he is full for a day.

Give a man a poisoned potato, he'll be full for the rest of his life.

I went out to buy some camouflage shirts the other day. Couldn't find any.

You learn something new every day.

Like the people in 9/11 are the world's fastest readers; they went through 100s in under a second.

Hey guys, I haven't been on in like freaking forever! Sorry. Anyways, I love you, Emerald! :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDD I hope you're on!

Love you all. Hope you all have a nice day, Best regards, Koko, <3

Hi Alex, you will probably not see this till the morning, but I just wanted to say I have had fun since you were here. Also, thank you so much for protecting me and being there for me. And yeah, have a good day!