daddy's jokes
Why are priests called father? Because it's not appropriate to call them daddy. Also because it is embarrassing.
A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, "Dad, how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big dick?"
Her father replied, "Honey, you should have watched me last night. It was inside my mouth. Does it cycle now?"
They don't call priests "daddy," they call me daddy.
Why do orphans love role-plays?
Because they can call someone "daddy."
Why do orphans become hookers?
'Cause they can call someone "daddy."
Why can’t orphans be gay?
They have nobody to call "daddy."
Yo daddy so stupid, he went to the HO-tel to see some hoes.
Why do you not have milk with your Oreos?
Daddy never came back with the milk.
Q: Why can't orphans be gay?
A: Because they don't have anyone they can call "Daddy."
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Why do people call priests "Father"?
Because it’s too suspicious to call them "Daddy."
What's the second worst thing to happen to orphans?
They can't have sex.
"Why?"
Because they don't have anyone to call mommy or daddy.
Why can't I be gay? I have nobody to call "daddy."
One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"
The mailman came to drop the mail off.
Me (son): I went and told my mommy that daddy is home.
Mommy tells me, "You got no daddy."
Then I say, "I hear you always call the mailman daddy."
Why can’t an orphan be gay?
Because they have no one to call “daddy.”
Little Johnny and little Sally walked in on Mommy and Daddy going at it in the bedroom doggy style. They innocently ask, "Mommy, Daddy what are you doing?"
Mommy says, "Oh, Daddy is just parking his car in Mommy's garage, now go and play."
A few minutes later they hear a blood curdling squeal and run to see what was the matter.
Little Johnny is running in circles squealing and little Sally says, "Well little Johnny was trying to park his car in my garage and he couldn't get the back wheels in so I took the scissors and cut them off."
Why did the orphan cheat on his girlfriend with a guy?
Because he wanted someone to call "Mommy" and "Daddy."
As a son, I set up a home date with my mom and my friend because I was going out of town. I set it up by telling my friend that my mom thinks he is cute, and I told my mom that my friend thinks that she is hot.
I came home the next day. I see in the living room my friend giving it to my mom doggy style. I ask what's going on. My mom said to me, "Meet your new daddy," then my friend said, "Hey son, get me a beer from the fridge."
"Tyler teller, come to daddy!"